Something very important has happened for me recently and i really want to share it with you.

Down through the years i have had many powerful experiences of awakening sitting with Papaji, Gangaji, Vartman, Rahasya, Arjuna and Dolano. But somehow there has always been a reidentification with ego with comcomittant suffering.

Last November i crashed into a mire of anxiety and have been a recurring visitor there pretty much ever since. The bouts of anxiety became gradually worse and two weeks ago i was in a really bad state.

At this time, I went into a long-planned three day retreat, turning off the phone and computer. I was determined to get to the bottom of this issue of suffering once and for all. I immersed myself in satsang videos, tapes and books and really tried to focus on the question "Who Am I?" I could recognize the freedom and beauty in the satsangs but it didn't affect my state of anxiety at all.

It felt hopeless, i really felt damned, in a tiny box with no way out. Evidently, it all depends on Grace and yet the suffering was unbearable. On and on this went day after day. On the last day, with only a little time left with no respite in sight, i kind of said, "Well, Existence, there's only a couple hours left and i want to be set right before the retreat is over." I then happened to see Eckhart Tolle's book The Power of Now and started reading it and, man! What a book! Tolle gives the clearest presentation of what enlightenment is that i have come across; what the causes of suffering are and what one can do to rediscover the truth of Being and live a life of unfathomable peace, joy and love which is our birthright.

One of the problems i had with all the satsang books and tapes etc was that i perceived there to be an emphasis on Grace, that one must just relax and things will basically take care of themselves. There is nothing really that one can do to "get it". Tolle emphasizes however that by focusing on the Now, simply taking in what is going on in the body and in ones surroundings, one naturally falls more and more into pure awareness. Less energy goes to the thinking mind, identification with which is the cause of all suffering.

Anyway, i straight away applied this in practice. In the midst of my intolerable anxiety and depression, i just turned my attention to what was going on around me, the sights, sounds and smells. Immediately i experienced a deep calm. No bliss or ecstacy or fireworks, just peace and the indescribable Presence.

Now i can report that this is simply turning my life around! As soon as i see i am thinking of the past or the future unnecessarily, i turn my attention to what is here now: sensations in the body, what's going on around me. And i am once again at peace. I know it sounds too simple but it's true! And it is just so fantastic that i just must write to you about it!

So if you too are really tired of suffering, I highly recommend this book, i cannot praise it enough.

In deepest gratitude,
Dana